Just for me.. and maybe my puppies :)

WHAT A DAY! I say this with a yawn. I am so tired. I had such an exhausting day. I tested out of my CDCs, I get my 5 level on Jan 17 and I got a haircut.

I took today off from the gym because I have my PT test tomorrow morning and I wanted to rest up my legs. I am so ready for this. I even have a pacer to go with me so I am hoping that it will be good and I will pass. It is the only part of the test I have to take. I am kind of excited. Even though if I pass I still have to take it in 6 months because I will be on a profile this time.

I seriously had some depressing thoughts today. I am not sure what they meant but I am worried about it.. :/

Tonight its about me.

Seriously, after every workout I feel extremely better about myself. I stand a little taller, smile a little more and look in the mirror and think "Damn!" ... Its to the point where I have officially decided that the shower after an awesome workout is WAY better than sex... (if you know me, you know whats going there... ) Todays work out was great! I did 15 minutes on the bike and I RAN for 20 minutes! I didn't stop. I got a little of a side ache but I kept breathing and it went away. I am so proud of myself. Can't wait to kick that PT test's butt!

Anywho! I am just sitting here all clean now trying to decide what to do for dinner because I don't want to ruin the work I just put in.. but then I remember I get to do it again tomorrow. :) And this is probably the shortest entry ever because I am the most uninteresting person ever... but I don't care. Tonight I feel great about myself. So great I think I am going to chipotle for dinner... or Thai... lol :)

Why can't it just be free?!

Seriously, I really do think some things are WAY over charged for. Just because it is a certain color, it has be another $100 for that and for this... Moving and trying to get things for the new house is making me grumpy and extremely unhappy.

I wanted to get another couch for the living room because it was going to be bigger than here and I wanted to have more space for people to sit. Sadly, this dream is quickly fading. And with the holidays here I am using money to send gifts back home.. and like I don't know. I am just trying to get my life in order with the move.

I have like 104598679327849834 things going on in my head and so many things that need to get done in order to move that I feel like I am not getting anything done. Like this week, I have physical therapy, my PT test and my test for my 5 level. I am stressing myself! I need to slow down but I can't. I need to breathe but thats kind of difficult when it feels like my entire world is resting on my shoulders.

Not to make anything better, but Bella got really sick this morning TWICE! The second time required her to get a bath because she like laid down in it. I got up because I could smell it and she was standing, in the middle of her kennel with the saddest look on her face. After her bath she just laid down and waited for me to clean her kennel and she seems to be fine now since she ate Peanuts food from this morning.. bleh.

Its Sunday. I should probably go finish my cleaning. bleh. bleh. bleh.

A day to just be upset.

Where the heck has this year gone?! January 15, 2013 marks one year since I moved to Ohio, changed my entire life because I had this dream of doing something greater for my life and now I don't know what I want. Its like every time I find something I want or I think could work it gets thrown back in my face. Like ha ha fool, jokes on you! It really makes me mad. I get upset and then the little green monster shows up, because I am watching everyone else achieve while I am failing. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

HATE is such a strong word but it is needed for today's thoughts. I hate the fact that I was lied too. When I knew what was gonna happen but I let myself get my hopes up anyway. I hate the fact that I am trying to show people I am trying to be a better person but they just blow me off or joke around like it doesn't hurt my feelings. I seriously am not as strong as I let on. I haven't cried in a while and yet today, today I wanted to. I wanted to pull over on the side of the road and just cry. I needed it, let me tell you... I really need it. I still haven't cried. I won't let myself cry. Not even tomorrow, not while I am baking my pepperoni pizza in the oven, sitting at home watching christmas movies by myself, with my two puppies... Nope it won't happen. I am going to just sit there and act like it is every other day. Heck maybe I might even start packing up the kitchen. Need to get it done. Only a month or so until move in day. I am freaking stoked.

Went to the gym today. It was a short work out. When I say short I mean short. I went in there was on the elepitcal for 10 minutes, rowed for 5, did 150 sit ups, and stretched. I wanted to go home and I still needed to get to Target before they closed so I could get the puppies their treats before tomorrow when everything closes for Thanksgiving. My day was pretty uneventful, besides me having a pity party.. but whatever. It is done. I am getting ready for bed, plan to sleep as long as I can this weekend, working out at home and just enjoying being off.

I am also putting my phone on do not disturb so I can only hear phone calls, I am ignoring text messages and any other ways of communication tomorrow because I feel like it. I am suppose to skype with my family back home but thats about it.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Be thankful for what you have and keep our troops in your prayers tomorrow night.  

Get Sexy?

Oh my goodness. It has been like 4 days since I last posted. I took the weekend off from the gym because one I didn't want to push myself too hard the first week and second because I was pretty busy this last weekend. Saturday I spent studying and running around looking for things to do. I went to Hooters for the first time on Saturday night. It was interesting, lots of greasy food and it made me regret not going to the gym or doing something during the day. Sunday I went to Columbus for the morning and in the afternoon I took a new friend to go furniture shopping. It was an interesting day to say the least. I enjoyed getting to spend time with friends this weekend and it made me feel at peace with myself for a while.

I am working out a good 45 minutes at the gym every day. I tend to stay to the same routine, nothing to depending until I get off of my profile for my wrist and I am working my legs hard so that when I run it is gonna be pretty easy (or so I hope). I  am mainly working on getting my heart rate up for about 30 minutes and keeping it there but some times I slack, let it drop a little but it gets right back up there pretty fast. I am in love with breaking a sweat.

I took these tonight.. Kind of like my beginning point pictures aka week 1. Probably gonna get into some trouble for posting these but I don't care because this is my blog and I want to track my progress. Currently this week I have been doing 20-25 minutes on the elepictal, 30 reps of different size weights on this leg machine, and rowing for about 10-15 minutes. Of course I stretch and do a bit of a cool down. 

I am actually proud of myself for sticking to this. I have my bag packed and ready for tomorrow. Gonna hit up the gym in the basement and get a good workout in, go to Target to buy a medicine ball for Thursday since almost every gym is closed and some puppy treats. Sounds like the life right? :D

Operation: Get Sexy Day 2!!

MY LEGS ARE JELLO!!! Seriously, I am like in enjoyable pain. I spent an hour and a half at the gym. I feel like I could of done more again today but like I wanted to go out tonight. Now, after I took my shower all I want to do is curl up in bed and cuddle with someone.

It was great day. I came home to only one accident by yet again Peanut and some hungry puppies. I love them to death but I wish I had help still some days. Especially when I feel sick, like tonight. I developed a small headache after my shower and it is just ugh.. 3 flights of stairs.. 2 big puppies and 1 me... ouch.

Oh and incase you were wondering, dinner tonight after my workout was a $5 BLT Footlong from Subway. It was amazing and made my tummy happy. I believe tomorrow is gonna be just a simple morning work out and then relax for the rest of the day. Only one more day until my complete day off from working out!

And by the way, if you aren't on pinterest yet you should be. You find awesome things like this!

Operation: Get Sexy.

It was started today. I spent an hour in the gym. 20 minutes on the treadmill thing, worked out my legs and got a little arm action. I am pretty impressed with it. I am gonna have to say that my min time in the gym is going to be an hour and max is gonna be three. When I was there I just wanted to keep going. It felt like the best feeling in the world.

I am doing this for myself. No one else. I can't wait to see what this is gonna be in a couple weeks. My work out plan is going to be Monday thru Saturday giving myself Sunday for my day off. I have a PT test in two weeks and I need to be ready for it. Not just for the PT test but because I want to be healthy and fit and keep a flat stomach when I sit down.

I do not own that picture. I got it from Pinterest. :)